ancient, actually) is what happened with
Miss Maine 2011, Emily Johnson.
She apparently abdicated her crown and
responsibilities because she had previous
plans for the weekend that the Miss USA
pageant was rescheduled to: her sister's
wedding.
Apparently there are many who are "disappointed"
in her choice not to fulfill her obligation.
While I understand that there are times that
people will count on us for something, there
are times that we will be unable to fulfill
their expectations.
Sometimes it will be for reasons that might
seem less than positive, and other times it
might be a case where someone just knows that
what they are doing is the right thing for
them to do.
Any time someone is disappointed, there will
be judgment and reasons to do what you
committed to. However, in some cases when
things happen to change the dynamic of your
commitment, it would be important to know
what is important to you so you will know
how best to proceed, and how to act when
those around you want you to act in a
potentially different way than you want to.
In general, it is good to be clear about
what is at the core of who you and and what
you want. When you are aware, it becomes
your Guidance System. When you aren't aware,
look to others, or are unwilling to listen,
you will likely perceive disappointment,
but it will more likely come from that
voice inside. You will also be more likely
to feel confused and unclear about what to
do, as well as have the associated feelings
that go with that.
It isn't often (ever?) easy to take a
stand, but I give those of you who are
reading this and are willing to be clear,
and to act on your convictions, big time
credit. You may or may not know where
you want to go, but you'll always know
if the things you are doing are getting
you any closer to being there. You
will also always know where you don't
want to be, so actions can be guided
that way, as well.
Perhaps there was a compromise of some
sort to be struck here, but you can
bet that if she had chosen the pageant
over her sister/family, there would
have been different types of judgments.
You'll never please everyone around
you, and trying is usually an unfruitful
task. While you are busy trying to
please them, consider that if you
were to do what works best for you, odds
are good you would be of better benefit
to those around you than if you bent to
their desires and/or manipulations.
It may not always be the case, but
if in the end only one of you will
feel OK with the outcome, who would
you want it to be? You? Or them?
(There's no "right" or "wrong"
answer, as there may be times you
want to please someone else, even
if it's not what you want. But by
choosing the answer over just going
with it by default will leave you
feeling better overall.
How you answer the question will
help you choose what to do next.)
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